Wednesday, May 28, 2008


Chapter one

The sun was shinning but it made no difference. It was twenty degrees outside and the wind cut right through you. I was on my way into the office when I received a call from Jessica that my nine o’clock appointment was running late. Good, I thought, that gives me enough time to grab a muffin. Jessica walked into my office and could not help herself and laughs; she stares at the welt on my head - “it gets bigger by the minute” Jessica said. I grab my handbag and pull out my compact. I looked at the image in the mirror and saw the horror in my eyes. “Oh my!” were the words that came out of my mouth, “Mr. Andrews will be here shortly and I look like I’m growing an antler - Great!” I was going through some papers when Jessica announced that Mr. Andrews had arrived. “Give me a minute, and then let him in.”

“Good morning Miss Peters.” said the voice from behind her. As she turns around to greet her client, she saw the eyes - the same eyes she saw that Sunday afternoon. “You!” she said. They both knew who the other one was. She was the girl he had knocked down by the market place. “I can’t believe its you,” he said, “I’ve thought about you constantly, even walked by the market place but never saw you again. Did I do that?” Carrie was motionless - she could not believe it was him. She could not breathe, could not talk but she had to make a motion. Carrie never answerd his question, she did not see the point in it. Carrie replied with a smile. “Let’s sit down; we have a lot to discuss.”

It was a quarter after two when Nick left the office and Carrie was exhausted.

Once the meeting ended, Jessica walked into the office. They went over some of the requirements that Mr. Andrews had in mind. “Jess, call Andy and see what he will have available for the month of June. We also have to” “Carrie” Jessica interrupted her.

“What did you think of Mr. Andrews?” Carrie smiled “What is there to think of” she winked and walked out of the office. “C’mon Carrie tell me, I noticed the way he looked at you, and you also forgot to mention that you two knew each other.” “Correction, he knocked me down two months ago - that doesn’t mean we know each other.” Carrie continues with her reading and ignored Jessica; she knows just what to say and do, to get to her sister. A few minutes later Carrie heard the door close and looked up to see Mr. Andrews standing in front of her. “Mr. Andrews, is there anything else that I can do for you?” Carrie asked, “Indeed you can” he replied, “Will you have dinner with me tonight?” “Mr. Andrews,” “Nick, call me Nick,” he replied. “Mr. Andrews, I don’t think that would be a good idea.” Carrie, not impressed by his dinner proposal, excused herself and walked him out.

Carrie went back to what she was doing but in the back of her mind, her thoughts were about Nick.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008


Mystical and enchanted was the warmth of your lips on that cold December evening.

I saw you in the crowded room; you danced the night away, as I watched from a distance, the fog intense and the music pumping.

My hands numb; my heart racing, as you drew closer, smiled and walked in the other direction.

You, there with your friends, and me among mine; I want you closer as the end reaches its climax. I turned to leave when a tap on the shoulder I feel.

You asked, I provided, and so this was the first kiss.

Mystical and enchanted was the warmth of your lips on that cold December night.


"Sex in the City", the movie, is in theaters May 30 and I am in pain;” My favorite show in the entire world and I’m going to miss the opening day. I want to YELL!!! Why do I have to move on that weekend, I mean I had no idea, if I did I would never arrange to move on the weekend of the 30th and so I cry with an empty Cosmo on my hands.

I know it's no big deal, but to me it is, “SEX IN THE CITY “is my bible, every girl should own all the seasons. Not only is the wardrobe to die for, but the “MEN” WOW the men of Sex in the City giving you a permanent orgasm, especially Mr. BIG, talk about MR Big I’ve always wondered about the name… HMM I love the imagination.


To all of you who a re going to watch the movie, if you hear sudden whimpers in the air, that would be me...


I fell a long time ago, not realizing that the impact was permanent.

I, so young and naive, and just like every child thinking that the worst was never to come.

It hid in the depths of my soul, lurking, taunting me, and I, not aware of how strong it was, paid any attention. I refused to see it, I refused to search for it and now it is here staring right at me, what am I to do? I question myself but have no answers to give, the pain so fresh in the mind and yet I thought forgotten. WHY???

So here I am looking back at the wounds inflicted upon and can’t help but wonder has someone else fallen and if so, how deep are their wounds?

Friday, May 23, 2008


Mesmerized by the scent of you has me in a trance; I'm rapt around the image of your body and the yearning that makes me cry. Give it to me, over and over again, isolated by desire and the passion that burns inside, rushing through my thighs. Oh how I long for the warmth of your flesh, and drowning by the juice of your fountain, harder and harder, the wounds in your back a sign of perfection as you leave me here content; breathless wanting more, my appetite increasing as I ride in for more.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008


I see you perfectly clear, and my mind wonders to places beyond my control, further than ecstasy. I am sailing blissfully, in this place called Neverland, the stillness of my heart content by your presence.

Yes, I know that you are a figment of my imagination and yes, I know that this is a dream, but love does not know the difference and my heart is at ease.

Take me in your arms and rock me gently, my love, but please don’t awaken me, let me sleep forever, and forever yours I will be, eternally, without an end.


I went out with some co workers;
I had a few drinks, well maybe a few too many,
But in my state of mind I think I behaved somewhat how I should have behaved.
I was a little out of control,
But totally in control of my actions.

Did I act like a fool, maybe, but a classy fool?
Was I affectionate, but of course, like I’ve always said “Brenda Judy is a lovable person?”
And if I am surrounded by my friends and loved ones, I will party like its 1999.

Now, what do you when you have a loose cannon among your group, someone who tends to go over the limit, not intentionally, but can’t control themselves or their actions, what then?

Do you continue partying, do you walk over to them and try to make them comprehend, do you slap the person, or simply forget to send him/her the next e-mail invite.

Well as for me I know I will get that e-mail invite but will I attend the next time not sure.


I am starving, I’m starving but what should I eat? Everyone around me is counting calories, looking for their carbs intake. I know we should all eat healthy, but hearing about it everyday hurts my ears.

I’m Latina, so you know that I love my rice and beans. I could eat it constantly, arroz con habichuelas (rice and beans) for me, with platanitos and a juicy filet of chicken. “WOW” just the thought of the food makes my mouth water; so really, do you think I have the time or mentality to count my carbs or calorie? “Yeah, right” my tummy has a mind of its own.

I believe that as long as your food portions are small and you don’t go over the top, you can indulge yourself with the simple pleasures of life. Don’t deny yourself the frappachino, just don’t get the extra large cup.


I remember the day we met; it was not your usual fairy tale story; girl meets boy, girl falls in love with boy, it was more than that. I knew right at that moment that he was the one, the one I have been waiting for. He would be the one that would embrace my heart like no other, but also tear it apart.

It was a cold November afternoon; I was out running some errands when out of nowhere he appeared. I fell flat on the floor and my bags were all over the place. My head was pounding and I was furious, never looking at the stranger who had knocked me down. When finally I stood up and turned to face him, his beauty blew me away. His eyes were the color of the sky; soothing, inviting and mesmerizing, he had gorgeous black hair and a smile that would weak anyone’s heart. He helped me up, apologized, took my hand gave it a gentle squeezed and then left, I just stood there frozen and for the first time I was lost for words.


I have a passion for writing, I am a working mother of 3 (all boys) and a wife.
Writing is my sanctuary and if you let me I will take you places beyond your imagination...

Once a week I will post bits and peaces of my story. I hope you enjoy reading it,as much as I did writing it.


Here I am, and there you are, miles apart.
I find it hard to breathe and the air thickens.
My heart weakens, fading into the eclipse of the unknown.
A forbidden desire; permissible by the audience of our existence.
As I drown longing for you, but where, where is that love that I so wish for?
I close my eyes, I embrace myself, wanting and craving you near.
But for how long, this hunger is eating me up and I not wanting to escape the passion of your existence, will be devoured by my own longing for you.
I feel you within my soul and this obsession won’t subside, My body aches and the throbbing of my inner thighs deafening.
Boom- boom fascinated by the overwhelming feeling of love and I burst, the orgasm mesmerizing yet not satisfying.
Once again reality strikes me gently.Here I am, and there you are, miles apart.


It is dark out tonight; the only light comes from the moon above. He walks and walks fear over takes his body and he shivers from the cold. Snap, crackle, he hears from a distance as he moves faster. The noises become louder, deafening his ear, he begins to run and stumble on a tree branch, whatever was following him is now standing over him. The look in his eyes, wide with fear, it is the red snapper, the same red snapper from his dreams, haunting and taunting him laughing with an evil laugh. HA- HA- HA…

Whatever happened to the stranger is still a mystery; the Red Snapper is still out there, waiting for her next victim. So beware, you’re not safe in the Cherry woods, it is haunted. If you listen carefully you will hear cries in the night. Moaning and howling waiting for the next one to arrive.


What do you do when you are in your work environment and you happen to walk by a cubicle and OMG! - it smells like someone died in there “literally”?

It happened to me; I was walking by a cubicle today and I almost dropped dead - the smell was unbearable. For a minute there, I went blank, sniffing all over the place, I almost passed out. “WOW” I thought to myself, not believing my nose.

So I wasn’t really sure what to do at that time; I mean, who am I to tell someone else that Dr Sholes is only a market away, even better, Zest “Not Clean until Zestfully Clean”. Do I drop a note? Do I e-mail the person, and if so, how do I even begin writing an e-mail like that one?

Dear so-so,I happened to walk by your area and smelled something fishy and it wasn’t your lunch! Come on, now, really, how do you address a delicate matter such as BODY/FOOT odor? Well as for me, I will walk in the other direction until I think of a nice way to tell someone that they stink -- plain and simple -- they stink!

Saturday, May 17, 2008


My heart melts with the thought of you,
it weakens in a way that it has never done before.
Look into my soul it has your name written all over it.
I love you so sincere; you will never know the passion that I feel when you kiss me, and you will never know the kind of love that I feel for you.
Nothing that you do will ever change my mind about us.
All I hear is what my heart is telling me; it leads me to you, this is real and I have never felt so sure about us, you are the one, the only one that I need.
I love you regardless of the pain, of the tears.
If you only knew how dear and special you are to me, you are my life, my world and my best friend.

Till the end.


How do you mend a broken heart?

When your tears are your only companion and your heart is devastated not comprehending what just happened.

Confusion over take the mind and depression waits in the midst of all the fog.

I loved you blindly gave you all I had to give.

Words of love so sweet and venomous to the soul,

You promised me the world,

You promise me the stars and

Yet I wait,

Instead I got my world torn upside down and

The stars were a figment of the imagination.

Love so blind and painful:

So how do you mend a broken heart?

When mine was yanked and rip of my chest with out a care.


The meaning of the word FRIEND

A person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.

A person who gives assistance; patron; supporter

A person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile

One who supports, sympathizes with, or patronizes a group, cause, or movement

A person with whom one is allied in a struggle or cause; a comrade

A person whom one knows; an acquaintance

A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts

So many meanings for the word FRIEND, yet so little people in my life fits all the description above.

I can count with one hand the amount of genuine friends that I have, not many.

Then I have my “so called friends” the ones who think that they are friends, in reality are only in my life because they feel obligated by some kind of attachment.

You have your childhood friends, they will always be a part of your life, but the friendship diminishes and weakens with the years to come and maturity.

You have your friends from high school/college, friendships that have gone through hangovers to heart breaks. Only a few of us are lucky to still have them in our life because once again friendship diminishes and weakens with the years to come and maturity.

You have the friends you meet along the way, you bond with some, connect in a way that you never dreamt possible. Then those of you who pretend to be a friend and have the least knowledge of what a true friendship consist of, one minute you’re white then you’re black.

For those of you who are my dearest and love friends, my heart and door are always open to you. For those of you who’s idea of friendship consist of a warm hello to your face and what a bitch when you walk away, I have my dog for that.

I learn each day the value of my dearest friends; you are my sisters, my packs. Just like I also know that the grass looks greener on the other side, but from where they are standing it is also greener on my side.

Thursday, May 15, 2008


Dancing to the rhythm of our hearts,

The pounding, the beating

The sexual healing.

Our bodies in twins,

Devour me with your tender lips.

Unchain these legs that long to spread some love,

Hold me tenderly, yet fiercely

Don’t let love subside.

Dancing wildly to the sound of our moans

Becoming one, drowning our souls

The melody has slowed it paced;

The calm awaits our presence,

Sleep takes over our body

Energizing it for the next band to play.


My sweet December;

I wait for your arrival every year to come,

Anxiously and anticipating

The crisp air so dry it burns your trough,

The sky a doll grey it makes you want to sleep.

Cuddling next to the fire places;

A cup of cocoa on your hand,

How bitter sweet the memories of a forgotten winter,

A forgotten love once so dear to you


Trying to cope with all the negativity that surrounds me not only puts a damper on my mood but it also taints the heart and mind.

I am counting my blessing and thanking the heavens above; I have you in my life, to guide me in the right direction, to clear my thoughts from all of the evil that I see.

This is going to either break me or make me a stronger person and I truly believe that I am a strong person.

I live in a world in which perfection does not exist, we are all bound to make mistakes, some greater than others.

I could both learn and accept the fact that we all hurt; deep inside, we all deal with different form of distress.

I will make the most of what I have encountered, and rather than run from it I will accept it for what it is, another test in my chapter.

I believe that only I hold the ending to my story, I am my own author the ending to my story will be mine to decide, and I love happy endings.


I love to write; I have a great passion for writing, it eases my mind, my heart and cleanses my soul. I would like to share with you a little piece of me, a side that only a few of you have seen.

It is not easy for me to open my heart to any one, I have been hurt and betrayed so many times by those who I love and trusted blindly. I always tend to have my guard up, walls higher than a sky scrapper. If you don’t know my struggles, you won’t know my life, if you don’t understand the reason for my tears; you will never understand my pain.

I am a survivor; I have fought so many wars within myself, life, and at the end of it all, I was the winner. I see things clearer now and understand that not every one shares my views in life.

People can choose to like me or choose to hate me, never the less my life will go on; whether it is with you or without you.

The choices I make, will have an impact on my life, the decisions I make can influence the outcome of my future. With every step I make, I will build on my life story; with every step backwards I will suffer my history twice.

I walk among the living; yet, half of the people that I encounter are dead inside.

They lack of many things; self respect honesty and most important they lack of love.

I have realized that with every good intention there are bad ones. You can love him/her today and tomorrow despise them.

I have a higher authority, which has guided me through the worst storms. I have learned that I cannot live life dwelling on ignorance, hoping that one day people would just accept the fact, that life is in fact a gift. Maybe then will I see a better future for my family, for my friends, for all of us?

Maybe then I will put my pen and paper away, maybe not, who knows. Life is a mystery, a novel on its own.


I live in a world where everything is based on rules; we either follow them or be sentenced by them.

If the lines between thick and thin were bendable; how do we go about doing so, and once we are there and have accomplished what we were destined to do, what will the outcome be?

Wanting to play my role in life “the good Samaritan” but will that be enough?

I mean, I could always look away, ignore our rules and regulations, or I could abide by them. But what fun will that be?

We all have our agendas in life, now it is up to us to open it up or dispose of it.

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